CW’s classic teen drama Riverdale shows no signs of slowing down the action with its upcoming release of the seventh and final season in March this year. Alongside many narrative twists and turns, the characters from the beloved Archie Comics have showcased plenty of change over the seasons and often sum up the circumstances they find themselves part of in hilarious and poignant ways.
As the primary narrator for this melodramatic and gritty YA series, Jughead (played by Cole Sprouse) often has some of the most quotable lines in the show. From iconic witticisms about himself and his friends to brooding ruminations on the state of the town, Jughead certainly has plenty of different sides he shows off on screen.
1 Sarcastic Scene Setter
“Sardonic humor is just my way of relating to the world.”
Early on in the first season of Riverdale, the show works hard to introduce viewers to the grittier reboot versions of the iconic Archie Comics characters. As for Jughead, his primary traits become his moody ponderings and his cynical snark.
This quote from the second episode of the first season sums up his style of humor perfectly. It comes as a response to Archie’s questioning of his desire to use Jason Blossom’s death as an excuse to get out of P.E. class. Can’t blame him for wanting to try.
2 Classic Loner Line
“Actually, I’m gonna sit alone. Just, you know, finish my book and brood.”
As an aspiring writer, Jughead is no stranger to copious amounts of alone time to work on his craft. He constantly ponders about the goings-on in town and provides the dark and ominous narration for what happens throughout the show’s many seasons.
In the third episode of the second season, the town is scrambling to figure out whether the three recent attempted murders are related. Jughead starts at Southside High, with the intention of keeping his head low. When he’s offered a place with the Serpents, he turns them down in preference for his solo writing time.
3 Whatever The Opposite Of Town Pride Is
“Perhaps in Riverdale, the best you could hope for wasn’t to win, but to draw and pray not to lose.”
In its six-season run, Riverdale has had plenty of wild narrative twists and complicated character turns. From a serial killer going undetected in town, to Cheryl performing a cult-like ritual to sacrifice Archie in order to save the town’s maple trees, there are plenty of dangerous and downright weird goings-on in the town.
So, when Jughead offers this piece of advice during his narration of episode eleven in the third season, it’s probably worth listening to. Very rarely do people win in Riverdale, and if they do, they’re often not the good guys.
4 Comeback King
“It’s called necrophilia, Reggie… Can you spell it?”
Jughead is a classic outsider when it comes to the cliques around the school. His penchant for alone time, brooding wit, and incessant pop culture references make him a target for discomfort and animosity from the other students.
But Jughead is also the king of sardonic comebacks, and often uses his wit to hit back at those criticizing him. In the second episode of the very first season, Reggie accuses Jughead of being involved with Jason Blossom’s death and ‘doing things’ to him after. Unfazed, Jughead insults him right back and puts Reggie in his place.
5 Emulating Literary Idols
“Hey, what’s that oft-used Mark Twain quote? ‘Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.’”
There’s no shortage of references to great literary works throughout Riverdale’s history, and some of the best of these come from Jughead himself. As a writer, he has a great appreciation for authors like Truman Capote and Ray Bradbury who both feature in some of his earlier scenes.
In the fourth season, Jughead transfers to a new school to further develop his writing. But after two fellow students plot to kill him, Jughead fakes his own death in an elaborate ploy to expose them. When he reveals himself to be alive in the season’s sixteenth episode, he wastes no time in referencing one of his literary heroes for some extra pizzazz.
6 Obituary Honor
“Fred left Riverdale better than when he found it. That’s his legacy.”
As a wisecracking outsider, Jughead isn’t outwardly known for his sentimentality. But throughout the seasons, the audience is introduced to his softer side in several small ways. One of these ways is shown in the very first episode of the show’s fourth season.
When Archie’s dad is killed in a hit-and-run accident outside town, Archie turns to Jughead to ask him to write an obituary. In a firelit room, Jughead honors the life of his friend’s father and writes a beautiful passage about Fred’s life that brings himself and the whole town to tears.
7 Moral Grey Areas
“To me, I don’t think the question is, “Whodunnit?” I think the real question is whether Riverdale is a place of good or a place of darkness and evil.”
The town of Riverdale is an incredibly complicated place. Bitter old rivals divide the citizens, and family grudges are passed on to the new generation. As the narrator of the story that unfolds before the audience, Jughead is in a prime position to weigh the morality of the town.
In the eleventh episode of the first season, he offers his perception of the relative goodness and badness of the town and its inhabitants while talking to his father. His father, FP, ultimately concludes that most things in Riverdale are painted in shades of grey, rather than in black and white.
8 Class Criticism
“So this is what one-percenters do for fun.”
A defining feature of Jughead’s personality is the hardship he’s endured over many years. From family problems with his father’s drinking to a period of time when he’s homeless and lives in the school, there are many reasons Jughead harbors resentment toward his more privileged peers.
When he attends a fancy new school to develop his writing, he still maintains a little of his ‘boy from the wrong side of the tracks’ charm. In the fifth episode of season four, he takes part in a game of murder with his new classmates but can’t help making a snarky comment about the strange pastime.
9 That Iconic Edgy Monologue
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m weird. I’m a weirdo. I don’t fit in, and I don’t want to fit in. Have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? That’s weird.”
No other line of Jughead is quite as memorable as his long tirade about how weird he is in the tenth episode of the first season. Riverdale fans and critics alike have undoubtedly seen the countless gifsets, screengrabs, and audio clips of this iconic scene on nearly every platform of social media.
When Betty throws him a surprise party without asking, Jughead is upset that his wishes for a quiet night in were disrespected. Once the two are alone, he confronts Betty about how much he dislikes the party and how he’ll always be an outsider from the wrong side of the tracks.