In the age of COVID-19, we don't know if Doom Eternal is the game we need right now. Yes, it's entertaining many people in the age of social isolation, so that's good. But at the same time, it's depicting a literal Hell on Earth! So, you know, not exactly the message we want to be spreading right now...
That said, Doom Eternal seems to be doing well. It's selling well (100,000 concurrent players at launch), and most people seem to enjoy it. But it's not perfect. Let's make it perfect. These are the ten biggest fixes that Doom Eternal needs.
10 Tone Down The "Arcade"Â Feel
Now, we understand that this could be a divisive argument. But we think Doom Eternal really needs to tone down the "arcadeyness" of it all. The first Doom struck the perfect balance between horror, old school thrills, modern gameplay improvements, and a lighthearted "arcade" tone.
Doom Eternal veers too far into the latter, complete with eye-popping colors, a lighthearted tone, and orbs that bob and flash and weave like they're in a rave. It's almost a little too much, and we would love if id scaled the goofiness down a tad.
9 Fix The Ammo System
id changed the gameplay for Doom Eternal, and the game places a much larger emphasis on ammo and resource management. The first Doom provided us ammo in spades, and it seemed like you never ran out. Now, you have to constantly find little enemies to kill with the chainsaw in order to receive ammo.
Yes, Doom did the same thing, but that game seemed to give you way more ammo. Also, the whole "chainsaw-ammo" mechanic wasn't nearly as important as it is here. This is especially frustrating when fighting large and more demanding enemies, as you either run out of bullets or run around killing minor enemies to receive precious ammo drops. We don't have time for that!
8 Fix The Doom Guy
This is another personal preference, but we vastly preferred the Doom Guy's characterization in the first Doom. In that game, he was your typical silent protagonist, only ramped up to 11.
He destroyed basically everything he saw, he was uber pissed off, and he plowed through the demons of Hell with no trouble at all. They changed his characterization in Doom Eternal and gave him more of an easygoing and apathetic personality. We don't care about his apathetic personality - we want the angry, violent, pissed off Doom Slayer of old!
7 Ease Up On The Difficulty
One of the major complaints regarding Doom Eternal is that it is just too darned difficult. We understand why id wanted to go in that direction. Slaying the demons of Hell probably isn't the easiest job in the world, and id wanted to make you earn your feelings of badassery.
But there's a fine line between making your players feel rewarded and simply pissing them off. And we don't know if Doom Eternal walks that line. This game can be silly hard, even on the easier difficulty settings. Call us wimps, we don't care.
6 Nerf The Unmaykr
Why yes, we did just complain about the difficulty. And now we're going to complain about the opposite! Once you get your hands on the Unmaykr, you can easily steamroll throughout the rest of the game without breaking much of a sweat.
Of course, there are a few caveats - you need to find all six Empyrean Keys in order to access the weapon, and it uses the same scare ammunition as the BFG. But once you find and use the Unmaykr, absolutely nothing can stand in your way. It makes certain sections, particularly larger battles, a disappointing cinch.
5 Get Rid Of The Jumping Puzzles
Oh, those darned jumping puzzles. Look, we enjoy a good puzzle as much as the next person. But is Doom really the game for it? People play Doom to run around really fast (like, unnaturally fast), shoot demons in the head, and rip out eyeballs.
We don't play it to experience some weirdly complex and often frustrating jumping puzzles. We (and many other people) don't think these have any place in Doom Eternal, and they only serve to significantly ruin the pacing and momentum.
4 Give Us More Time In The Secret Encounters
This one also has to do with the game's egregious difficulty. Let's face it, some of the side quests are ridiculously difficult, especially the Secret Encounters that task you with killing certain enemies in under thirty seconds. Two Whiplashes and a Mancubus? A Marauder? In under thirty seconds? You're joking.
Unfortunately, the game is not joking, and these encounters will make you want to tear your hair out. Luckily they're not mandatory. Otherwise we'd be snapping the disc in half.
3 Get Rid Of The Purple Goo
We appreciate id's thought process behind the purple goo, as it serves to take away the player's speed and mobility. And in a game that relies so heavily on speed and mobility, this could prove an interesting little challenge. But it doesn't.
Unfortunately, the purple goo sections are nothing but frustrating. You can't jump, you can't dash, you can't even walk at a decent speed. Not only that, but annoying tentacles will periodically pop out of nowhere and shave off a good chunk of your health. Talk about annoying.
2 Scale Back The Enemies
We never thought we'd say this, but could you ease up on the enemies? Again, Doom struck the perfect balance between fun and difficulty, giving us just enough enemies to dispatch without it feeling overwhelming.
Doom Eternal suffers a bit from "sequel-itis" and said, "That, but more!" As a result, we get relentless waves upon waves upon waves of enemies, and it gets really old after a while. We feel like we need to take a break and step out after every battle, because this game is a true assault on the nerves and the senses.
1 Get Rid Of The Bethesda.Net Account Requirement
This one isn't really about the game itself, but the mere process of playing the game in the first place. Unfortunately, Doom Eternal requires a Bethesda.net account to play. But...why?
Yeah, we understand that this isn't a super big deal, but seriously, what is the point of this? What happened to the good old days when you simply bought a game and were allowed to play it (pushes up reading glasses and shakes cane)?